Who am I, why am I here … and why have I had so many jobs? — I’m a deep thinker from way back. As a small child, I recall wondering, for example, why my first grade teacher was so unhappy. Her name was Mrs. Sullivan and she didn’t seem to like first-graders. Since then, I’ve discovered that teaching is a profession that can make it difficult…

It’s not because I don’t like you — I went to the cast party last night, after talking my husband into talking me into it. I was tired, but he wanted finger food and celebration. It dawned on me I was missing something, which first appeared to be sleep. Upon deeper reflection, the vanished ingredient was more sublime…

We are almost halfway through the gauntlet and I’m ready — I’ve been ignoring the throngs, as they paw through items in the Walmart aisles and bins, and rightfully so. They ignore me. I avoid the grocery store, sending my spouse who claims to enjoy “an outing.” …

We’ve reached a new low: eight billion idiots — I don’t like calling it climate change, but somewhere along the way Dick Cheney’s fictional spin on ‘global warming’ took root and it’s too late now. In general, it’s too late now, which is the crux of the gloom and doom humor about overpopulation, a term so boring even the…

When the fog clears, you can finally see — We mostly swing between a choice of two slightly uncomfortable states of being: stress and boredom. Some lean towards excitement and activity, risking burnout. The other half tilt toward wasting away in Margaritaville, stalked by boredom and a Tommy Bahama wardrobe. Whether a Parrothead or a head honcho, we share…

When in Rome — I have several GOP pals in the neighborhood, and the list expands every time I join a club. Lately, I’ve been getting more FB friend requests, and that’s when I began to wonder if trouble isn’t brewing. I’ve always been out of sync with the in-crowd, not to mention the…

When being a garbageman made sense — I am not by conventional standards a success. This has been going on for a long time. I’ve had desultory triumphs on the road to sighing, giving up, and admitting I’m more average than the number five. In school, they smacked plenty of “Satisfactory” S letters while I racked up…

The complicated truth about growing up privileged and spoiled — The first time I remember being called ‘spoiled’ was when my best friend, all of nine, reacted suddenly to my Christmas haul with: “My mom says you’re spoiled!” I didn’t know what spoiled meant, except that it didn’t sound good and maybe I should never again brag about whatever I…

I will pay you to stop sending this useless crap — Dear Wildlife Organization, This afternoon you sent me another calendar in the mail, this one with photos of graceful swans, cute foxes, and drop-dead gorgeous sunsets. I’m not against birds, mammals, or the sun. In fact, I adore wildlife and the solar system. When I see a fox (excluding the…